Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Day 6

The emptiness is overwhelming.

The struggle of knowing what to do or where to go next is just that, a struggle.
I feel as though I've been in a massive whirlpool going around and around all the while holding my husband and then it suddenly, finally stopped. Not only is my husband not in my grips, I'm still dizzy and struggling to catch my breath. Where is the shore?

My prayers for direction continue and the answers are all, wait.
So I will.

The prayers for peace continue, I can tell these are answered with yes. I truly do feel a peace. The peace doesn't take away from my sorrow. It makes it more bearable. I wonder how people without hope ever survive.
Another way I can tell the answers have been yes, I woke with some sort of bronchial illness. I couldn't get anyone from the Drs on the phone so I decided to just go into town, see if they were open and make a stop for meds at the local store. They were open and appointment scheduled for tomorrow! WOW not next week! AND I didn't have any overwhelming thoughts of kicking or punching anything. Those feelings have me a little confused but I'm pretty sure they will subside.
I hope.

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